That's intense
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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