Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
