You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
