Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
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