Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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