Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
