Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Randomize