hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize