Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
How drunk are you?
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?