sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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