alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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