thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Randomize
