I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
