Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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