You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
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We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
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Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
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