I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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