i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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