dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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