I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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