Are we in a gay sports bar?
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
