my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
