no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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