that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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