how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Randomize
