Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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