she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
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the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
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It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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