I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize