I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
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