i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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