did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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