haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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