You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Randomize
