Will you blow on my dice?
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
ttyl tear gas
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize