He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Randomize
