and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
They took my balls.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Randomize
