community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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