I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'm too high and old for this...
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
