This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
