i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
