My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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