Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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