i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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