I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
