wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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