Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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