ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
i wish my penis had a tongue
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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