I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
