fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
