If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
