so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
