i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Randomize
